Meester Bond
New member
Putting in my entry for the competition.
I'm reviewing Mia from O Group.
..............................................................................
So, my friends, this was my first time going to O Group. Walking along the street, I felt like I was the man with the golden gun in some foreign country going to meet an exotic bird. But yet it’s just Mount fucking Eden with a bloody prison down the road! Nothing exotic about that, right?
Ah what the fuck. You only live twice. Humour me, my friends.
I’m in Sin City, Thailand, heading for hot, raunchy sex with a girl I’m really hoping is as hot as her pics.
So, I arrive at this old movie theatre. It’s right on the main street. Fuck. Really? I’m gonna look like some pervert heading into a brothel. Great. But okay, I guess I am really. So I just act casual, like I’m James Bond strolling into a bar to have a Martini, shaken, not stirred. (Hopefully soon to be shaking and stirring Mia)
Minutes later I’m in this pretty dingy dark room that was in real need of a reno. There’s a bed and there’s a massage table with one of those glory holes for a masseuse who doesn’t want to see your body and can just focus on your dick.
Anyway, my friends, I’m sitting there for about five minutes, waiting for my Octopussy to arrive, thinking, what a shit hole and finally in comes Mia. And she’s all right. Dressed in nice slutty lingerie that I was looking forward to peeling off her body in a few minutes.
Her skin’s browner than in her pics. She has a few tats. Not excessive. Seeing her face, she’s obviously Māori. But that’s fine, I’m not racist. As long as she has firm tits, a nice round ass, clean pussy and a rimmable butthole, I’m up for being the spy that shags her.
She’s all smiles and really friendly.
‘Hey, sweetie,’ she says. ‘What’s your name?’
Automatically I reply, ‘My names Bond. Brooke B—’
No, of course I didn’t say that! I’m all for fantasy, my friends, but I’m not gonna make a monkey out of myself.
(old PG Tips humour there)
So I just say, ‘You can call me Al.’
Face 7/10
Body 8/10 (just like her pics)
So I have my shower and back in the room, my thoughts return to how dark and dingy it is. I like to be able to see what I’m eating, you know? Get a good view of that pussy and that butthole. How can I if the room’s this dark?
‘Mind if we have a bit more light?’ I ask.
‘Sorry, I’d rather keep it a little bit dark.’
Great, I’m thinking. She thinks I’m an ugly bastard and doesn’t wanna see too much of me. So much for being debonair. But okay, I’m not gonna complain about that, it’s not that big a deal. I guess I’ll just have to do a little more probing with my tongue to get to the right places.
So we get onto the bed and I pull her in for some loving but she stops.
‘Hold on. I just wanna check you out first.’
‘Umm…sure, okay.’
Next thing she’s down having a good old examination of James Bond Jnr making sure everything’s in its right place and there’s no nasty whatevers down there.
Then she comes up. ‘All good. Just wanna make sure you’re clean and healthy.’
‘No worries,’ I said.
So we start with a little cuddling and kissing. She’s a great kisser and her fingers are great caressing my thunderballs. And then I unstrap her bra, letting out these very big, firm, obviously silicone-enhanced titties. Which I’m fine with. No nipple piercings either, which I’m glad about, because sucking on bits of metal rather than nipples is not my idea of fun.
But wait, my friends! What’s that?
A long scar stretched across her lower stomach.
I hide a shudder.
Oh fuck! Is this a post-op trans? Maybe I really am in Sin City and I’ve booked myself a ladyboy! (God I hope it’s not Winter/Rain!) But nah, there’s no other scarring anywhere else I can see. And her face is very feminine too.
I examine it closer and run my finger along it. ‘This looks like a caesarean scar.’
‘No.’ She chuckles. ‘I’d been out of work for quite some time and put on a little weight. I wanted to get rid of it so I could have a nice slim waist.’
Well, it had sure done the trick. Her waist is really skinny with big hips and massive butt. (I love big butts and I cannot lie!)
So anyway, my friends, I get her on her hands and knees. Got to, right? And I slowly peel off those panties, and despite the lack of light, still getting a fantastic view of her ass in all its glory. Yep. The pussy is real. A nice inny and she has a beautiful butthole with a star shape. Just begging to be rimmed. But that was an extra.
Pussy 7/10
Butt hole 9/10
Fake breasts 8.5/10
Next thing for me is always 69. So she’s on top of me and that big beautiful ass is right there in my face.
This is when I’m happy to be called a butt-kisser, my friends.
So I’m doing just that, squeezing those magnificent butt cheeks, spreading them to have a good look at that asshole. And then I get to work with the tongue, probing that pussy and sucking on that clit, causing her to groan and jerk around quite a bit, which I find really hot. Especially when those butt cheeks come slapping back into my face. Her cheeks against my cheeks.
I’m in heaven, my friends!
And she’s down there working on little Jimmy. But she’s not doing it right. Not for me.
‘Squeeze it harder…’ I command.
She squeezes but I didn’t notice any difference.
‘Harder,’ I urge.
‘Okay. But I'm worried I'm gonna hurt you.'
'You wont.'
So she squeezes it a little more.
‘Even harder than that.’
I’m definitely no masochist, my friends, but why are SWs so afraid to give it a good squeeze and tug? Are all SW clients little wusses or something?
‘Really throttle it,’ I say.
So she finally does. ‘That must hurt.’
I’m breathing heavily now. ‘No, it feels great.’
Now she’s got it. She’s working on my goldmember like a pro and I’m struggling to focus on her delicious cunt.
‘Keep going,’ I say. ‘Just as long as you don’t get a sore hand. I wouldn’t want you to get OOS,’ I joke.
‘What’s that?’
Really?
‘RSI?’ I say. ‘Repetitive stress injury? Occupational overuse syndrome?’
She giggles. ‘Nah, I’m good. I can do this for as long as you want.’
Hell, I could stay in that position for the whole hour, my friends, with my face buried in that derrière, but I’m well aware that time is ticking. I need at least 20 minutes for the real action otherwise I’ll feel too rushed and not be able to cum.
So I tell her it’s time for a BJ and she slips on that condom like a pro and gets to work and it feels great.
But if there was a clock in that room, the ticking would be thundering in my ear, so five minutes will have to do. Besides, I’m ready to slide my cock into a nice hot wet pussy.
So I get her to do Cowboy. She climbs on top of me and slips my rod into her cunt, groaning as she does, slowly easing herself down over it.
She begins to ride slowly at first, then speeds up.
Next thing I’ve got Calamity Jane riding me. And I’m getting a great view of those silicon-enhanced puppies bouncing up and down. Of course I have to do a bit of squeezing and sucking on those nipples at the same time.
So a few minutes of that and it’s time to switch positions. Doggy is a must for a girl with a butt like hers. So I get that rear end up and I stand on the floor, pulling those hips closer to the edge of the bed so I can drive my spike in.
This is where I get to look in the mirror.
Who’s that lucky guy over there? Oh right! Me!
And she’s looking back at me in the mirror, smiling and eyeing me up sexily while I’m giving her butt a few slaps and a good squeeze.
I can feel the orgasm coming, my friends, but I don’t wanna shoot my load just yet. I’ve still got about ten minutes. So a change of position is in order.
Another favourite of mine, getting her onto her back, her legs up, and me coming in low at an adjacent angle. But close enough to be able to give one of those falsies a bit of a squeeze. I can also see myself going in and out like a piston.
I have to admit, my friends, at this stage it’s me doing all the work. But she did do well with cowboy. But I’m okay with that. I like to be in charge, anyway.
So shortly after that, I’m coming down the home straight and shooting over the finish line. I’m done.
I tell you, my friends… it sucks only being a one-shot guy. Otherwise, I could have come a lot sooner and gone for a second shot. But that’s the way it is.
So for the last five minutes we cuddle up, I do a lot of rubbing my hands over her body and we have a few laughs and a bit of banter. As far as I’m concerned, a nice way to finish off a session.
Now it's time to go somewhere for a drink. Not a martini though. A beer.
BJ 5/10
Eye contact 7/10
Sex 8/10
Bond Girl rating 8/10
I'm reviewing Mia from O Group.
..............................................................................
So, my friends, this was my first time going to O Group. Walking along the street, I felt like I was the man with the golden gun in some foreign country going to meet an exotic bird. But yet it’s just Mount fucking Eden with a bloody prison down the road! Nothing exotic about that, right?
Ah what the fuck. You only live twice. Humour me, my friends.
I’m in Sin City, Thailand, heading for hot, raunchy sex with a girl I’m really hoping is as hot as her pics.
So, I arrive at this old movie theatre. It’s right on the main street. Fuck. Really? I’m gonna look like some pervert heading into a brothel. Great. But okay, I guess I am really. So I just act casual, like I’m James Bond strolling into a bar to have a Martini, shaken, not stirred. (Hopefully soon to be shaking and stirring Mia)
Minutes later I’m in this pretty dingy dark room that was in real need of a reno. There’s a bed and there’s a massage table with one of those glory holes for a masseuse who doesn’t want to see your body and can just focus on your dick.
Anyway, my friends, I’m sitting there for about five minutes, waiting for my Octopussy to arrive, thinking, what a shit hole and finally in comes Mia. And she’s all right. Dressed in nice slutty lingerie that I was looking forward to peeling off her body in a few minutes.
Her skin’s browner than in her pics. She has a few tats. Not excessive. Seeing her face, she’s obviously Māori. But that’s fine, I’m not racist. As long as she has firm tits, a nice round ass, clean pussy and a rimmable butthole, I’m up for being the spy that shags her.
She’s all smiles and really friendly.
‘Hey, sweetie,’ she says. ‘What’s your name?’
Automatically I reply, ‘My names Bond. Brooke B—’
No, of course I didn’t say that! I’m all for fantasy, my friends, but I’m not gonna make a monkey out of myself.
(old PG Tips humour there)
So I just say, ‘You can call me Al.’
Face 7/10
Body 8/10 (just like her pics)
So I have my shower and back in the room, my thoughts return to how dark and dingy it is. I like to be able to see what I’m eating, you know? Get a good view of that pussy and that butthole. How can I if the room’s this dark?
‘Mind if we have a bit more light?’ I ask.
‘Sorry, I’d rather keep it a little bit dark.’
Great, I’m thinking. She thinks I’m an ugly bastard and doesn’t wanna see too much of me. So much for being debonair. But okay, I’m not gonna complain about that, it’s not that big a deal. I guess I’ll just have to do a little more probing with my tongue to get to the right places.
So we get onto the bed and I pull her in for some loving but she stops.
‘Hold on. I just wanna check you out first.’
‘Umm…sure, okay.’
Next thing she’s down having a good old examination of James Bond Jnr making sure everything’s in its right place and there’s no nasty whatevers down there.
Then she comes up. ‘All good. Just wanna make sure you’re clean and healthy.’
‘No worries,’ I said.
So we start with a little cuddling and kissing. She’s a great kisser and her fingers are great caressing my thunderballs. And then I unstrap her bra, letting out these very big, firm, obviously silicone-enhanced titties. Which I’m fine with. No nipple piercings either, which I’m glad about, because sucking on bits of metal rather than nipples is not my idea of fun.
But wait, my friends! What’s that?
A long scar stretched across her lower stomach.
I hide a shudder.
Oh fuck! Is this a post-op trans? Maybe I really am in Sin City and I’ve booked myself a ladyboy! (God I hope it’s not Winter/Rain!) But nah, there’s no other scarring anywhere else I can see. And her face is very feminine too.
I examine it closer and run my finger along it. ‘This looks like a caesarean scar.’
‘No.’ She chuckles. ‘I’d been out of work for quite some time and put on a little weight. I wanted to get rid of it so I could have a nice slim waist.’
Well, it had sure done the trick. Her waist is really skinny with big hips and massive butt. (I love big butts and I cannot lie!)
So anyway, my friends, I get her on her hands and knees. Got to, right? And I slowly peel off those panties, and despite the lack of light, still getting a fantastic view of her ass in all its glory. Yep. The pussy is real. A nice inny and she has a beautiful butthole with a star shape. Just begging to be rimmed. But that was an extra.
Pussy 7/10
Butt hole 9/10
Fake breasts 8.5/10
Next thing for me is always 69. So she’s on top of me and that big beautiful ass is right there in my face.
This is when I’m happy to be called a butt-kisser, my friends.
So I’m doing just that, squeezing those magnificent butt cheeks, spreading them to have a good look at that asshole. And then I get to work with the tongue, probing that pussy and sucking on that clit, causing her to groan and jerk around quite a bit, which I find really hot. Especially when those butt cheeks come slapping back into my face. Her cheeks against my cheeks.
I’m in heaven, my friends!
And she’s down there working on little Jimmy. But she’s not doing it right. Not for me.
‘Squeeze it harder…’ I command.
She squeezes but I didn’t notice any difference.
‘Harder,’ I urge.
‘Okay. But I'm worried I'm gonna hurt you.'
'You wont.'
So she squeezes it a little more.
‘Even harder than that.’
I’m definitely no masochist, my friends, but why are SWs so afraid to give it a good squeeze and tug? Are all SW clients little wusses or something?
‘Really throttle it,’ I say.
So she finally does. ‘That must hurt.’
I’m breathing heavily now. ‘No, it feels great.’
Now she’s got it. She’s working on my goldmember like a pro and I’m struggling to focus on her delicious cunt.
‘Keep going,’ I say. ‘Just as long as you don’t get a sore hand. I wouldn’t want you to get OOS,’ I joke.
‘What’s that?’
Really?
‘RSI?’ I say. ‘Repetitive stress injury? Occupational overuse syndrome?’
She giggles. ‘Nah, I’m good. I can do this for as long as you want.’
Hell, I could stay in that position for the whole hour, my friends, with my face buried in that derrière, but I’m well aware that time is ticking. I need at least 20 minutes for the real action otherwise I’ll feel too rushed and not be able to cum.
So I tell her it’s time for a BJ and she slips on that condom like a pro and gets to work and it feels great.
But if there was a clock in that room, the ticking would be thundering in my ear, so five minutes will have to do. Besides, I’m ready to slide my cock into a nice hot wet pussy.
So I get her to do Cowboy. She climbs on top of me and slips my rod into her cunt, groaning as she does, slowly easing herself down over it.
She begins to ride slowly at first, then speeds up.
Next thing I’ve got Calamity Jane riding me. And I’m getting a great view of those silicon-enhanced puppies bouncing up and down. Of course I have to do a bit of squeezing and sucking on those nipples at the same time.
So a few minutes of that and it’s time to switch positions. Doggy is a must for a girl with a butt like hers. So I get that rear end up and I stand on the floor, pulling those hips closer to the edge of the bed so I can drive my spike in.
This is where I get to look in the mirror.
Who’s that lucky guy over there? Oh right! Me!
And she’s looking back at me in the mirror, smiling and eyeing me up sexily while I’m giving her butt a few slaps and a good squeeze.
I can feel the orgasm coming, my friends, but I don’t wanna shoot my load just yet. I’ve still got about ten minutes. So a change of position is in order.
Another favourite of mine, getting her onto her back, her legs up, and me coming in low at an adjacent angle. But close enough to be able to give one of those falsies a bit of a squeeze. I can also see myself going in and out like a piston.
I have to admit, my friends, at this stage it’s me doing all the work. But she did do well with cowboy. But I’m okay with that. I like to be in charge, anyway.
So shortly after that, I’m coming down the home straight and shooting over the finish line. I’m done.
I tell you, my friends… it sucks only being a one-shot guy. Otherwise, I could have come a lot sooner and gone for a second shot. But that’s the way it is.
So for the last five minutes we cuddle up, I do a lot of rubbing my hands over her body and we have a few laughs and a bit of banter. As far as I’m concerned, a nice way to finish off a session.
Now it's time to go somewhere for a drink. Not a martini though. A beer.
BJ 5/10
Eye contact 7/10
Sex 8/10
Bond Girl rating 8/10
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