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Can't be arsed...

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Squidward

Creep
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Anyone got anything non-performance related that puts them off either bothering to punt or visiting a particular lady that catches your eye on the various escort listing sites?

For me a huge one is traffic. Living in Auckland traffic sucks, and there have been a bunch of times when I've been keen for a punt, then can't be arsed cause I will be stuck in gridlock. Late last year I bought an apartment within walking distance of DB and Vixens, and due to not needing to wade through traffic I have definitely been punting alot more and a huge part is that I can just walk 5 or 10 minutes to get a gobby from a hard working immigrant lady.
 
GripMaster said:
Photoshopping of images - The apartment has this new girl Mirah looks amazing but don’t know what to expect.
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I'm actually ok with photoshopping. At least I have a point of reference to adjust. I usually expect -10% to -30% on their faces and if that's a pass, i take a swing :ROFLMAO:
 
There's a few gut things I go on, if I read and Interpret their profile to be negative biassed listing all the shit they won't and don't do instead of the things they can do they can get fucked, that's poor marketing and their problem. If they list everything as menu pricing I Interpret that as you can sit there in the nuddy looking at them for 1 hour but not touch them without paying on top of the 200 you've already given them for a root so they can get fucked too (specific things like rimming I accept as a bonafide extra cost). Once through all that when making a booking if they won't confirm an address with me they can get fucked and I just txt them back and tell them I'm cancelling the booking, I make no exceptions on that, I've only been ghosted on bookings 3-4 times in 45 years but I'm still not going to put myself in a situation that I can be ghosted after fucking around getting prepared, showered and cleaned up and driving off into town for a ghost booking. I'm a good client, I've been around a long time and have always been well mannered, respectful and never haggle or cause problems, it's their loss if the miss out on a good customer I'll move onto the next provider that meets my expectations
 
dodo69 said:
Blurred faces. I get it but I don’t like it…
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This one, face is the most important factor for me, think I will punt less tbh without the blurred faces but the one I punt will be good so I may end up punting more...

Okay I am confused lol

Also extras, fuck extras.
 
After so many years, I believe I am quite streetwise enough to get a few things from their ads and communication that will prevent me to visit someone. For example.

  • Location - I will never visit someone in places like Ranui, Henderson, Massey, Avondale, Manukau, Papatoe, Otahuhu, Manurewa, Mangere, Marua Road, Clonbern Road, Glen Innes.
  • If the ad is for Asian + North Shore + Cheap - Forget it...there are some exceptions....a few only.
  • If the ad is for a Brazilian girl working from a Motel on Great South Road, Newmarket - Forget it....
  • Some nationalities, like Indian, Pacific Island......with rare exceptions, they are either terrible or photoshopped to hide their 120 kg of lard
  • If you txt the girl and the reply is something like "When you cum ? are you cum now ?".....forget about it.
  • Again, if the girl advertises herself like Taiwan, Mongolia, Laos, Cambodia, etc....90% of the time are Chinese girls pretending to be from another nationality
  • 29 years old - Not sure what the magic is about this number, but check how many girls advertise as "29 yr old". Usually, the reality is 39 or even 49.
  • Hiding information about the address - you get a text saying "address is XYZ avenue".... What's the number? The answer is...." Come here first and I will tell you"
  • Or, they give you the full address and then you go to Google Maps and find out that the house is a freaking dilapidated shack with overgrown grass, broken glass..etc.. NO WAY
I would stick to some of the traditional places like DH, SC, Apartment, SL, LF and a few independent girls out there who are well rated and known.
It's not 100% guarantee you will have a good time, but it's much more likely that it will be a successful shag than a bad one.
 
MysticStar said:
After so many years, I believe I am quite streetwise enough to get a few things from their ads and communication that will prevent me to visit someone. For example.
[*]If the ad is for a Brazilian girl working from a Motel on Great South Road, Newmarket - Forget it....
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Pre-Covid this combo actually used to be a pretty decent indicator of attractive SA + good service.
 
Squidward said:
Anyone got anything non-performance related that puts them off either bothering to punt or visiting a particular lady that catches your eye on the various escort listing sites?

For me a huge one is traffic. Living in Auckland traffic sucks, and there have been a bunch of times when I've been keen for a punt, then can't be arsed cause I will be stuck in gridlock. Late last year I bought an apartment within walking distance of DB and Vixens, and due to not needing to wade through traffic I have definitely been punting alot more and a huge part is that I can just walk 5 or 10 minutes to get a gobby from a hard working immigrant lady.
Click to expand...
That’s awesome buying an apartment to be close to whore houses. You are an inspiration.

My biggest non sex punting issue is places that don’t have a cafe or bar with a toilet nearby. I always like having a relaxing drink or snack and to use the facilities before I punt. For some reason I usually get an excitement urge to shit before a punt.
 
Oh yeah, the ol' classic nerves/excitement dump before a punt. Gets me every time - and often after I've specially has a shower and made myself 100% rimmable. Bah :poop:

For me. it's AI or flowery language in the listing.
I'm ok with bad grammar or spelling, because at least they are trying and it's authentic. The fake fluffy shit is a giveaway of a girl that is also going to be fake and fluffy.
And yeah, a large list of extras is usually a no-go for me too. I'm ok with rimming or anal or BDSM being an extra, but when it's kissing, touching, looking, blinking is listed as an extra, yeah, na.
 
And travelling, I actually don't mind a bit of a drive.
I put on some music, get the cash, find a little gift if it's the right kind of punt, sometimes go for a beer or get an energy drink and enjoy it in a nice spot - get in the zone.
 
I don't know what you cunts got going on in your lives that you can chill out, have snacks, take nervous shits, buy little gifts, go to cafes, and generally fuck around before your punts!!

I'm so fucking busy, I am usually working til the last second right before I hop on my motorbike and blast down the motorway, lane splitting, to barely make my booking on time lol. Pretty much every time I punt
 
OldMacdonald said:
I don't know what you cunts got going on in your lives that you can chill out, have snacks, take nervous shits, buy little gifts, go to cafes, and generally fuck around before your punts!!

I'm so fucking busy, I am usually working til the last second right before I hop on my motorbike and blast down the motorway, lane splitting, to barely make my booking on time lol. Pretty much every time I punt
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OldMac is so short on time he has to bundle his haircuts and punts together 🤣
 
Squidward said:
Anyone got anything non-performance related that puts them off either bothering to punt or visiting a particular lady that catches your eye on the various escort listing sites?

For me a huge one is traffic. Living in Auckland traffic sucks, and there have been a bunch of times when I've been keen for a punt, then can't be arsed cause I will be stuck in gridlock. Late last year I bought an apartment within walking distance of DB and Vixens, and due to not needing to wade through traffic I have definitely been punting alot more and a huge part is that I can just walk 5 or 10 minutes to get a gobby from a hard working immigrant lady.
Click to expand...
For me too it's the travelling that makes me say, "fuck that".
A solution would be to book a hotel and have the lady come to you!
I think I will try that the next time.
 
DarkElmo said:
For me too it's the travelling that makes me say, "fuck that".
A solution would be to book a hotel and have the lady come to you!
I think I will try that the next time.
Click to expand...
Outcalls are fucking great. Nothing better than travelling for work and having some ass delivered to your hotel.

Cost a bunch, but man a 90 minute sesh from a working girl after a long day of wheeling and dealing is just the right pace to then crash put in the hotel room.
 
massagefan said:
That’s awesome buying an apartment to be close to whore houses. You are an inspiration.

My biggest non sex punting issue is places that don’t have a cafe or bar with a toilet nearby. I always like having a relaxing drink or snack and to use the facilities before I punt. For some reason I usually get an excitement urge to shit before a punt.
Click to expand...
I didn't do it just for the punts, but it has been a great extra benefit.

Even getting outcalls to my place has been cool. My first week there I got a regular to turn up and I fucked her on every surface I could. Makes me laugh when mates came over the next day and sat on one of the spots she squirted on and copped a load on her face.
 
Squidward said:
I didn't do it just for the punts, but it has been a great extra benefit.

Even getting outcalls to my place has been cool. My first week there I got a regular to turn up and I fucked her on every surface I could. Makes me laugh when mates came over the next day and sat on one of the spots she squirted on and copped a load on her face.
Click to expand...
Hahahaha that's awesome!!!
 
OldMacdonald said:
I don't know what you cunts got going on in your lives that you can chill out, have snacks, take nervous shits, buy little gifts, go to cafes, and generally fuck around before your punts!!

I'm so fucking busy, I am usually working til the last second right before I hop on my motorbike and blast down the motorway, lane splitting, to barely make my booking on time lol. Pretty much every time I punt
Click to expand...
Yeah, I used to load my days up like that.
No more. I pay others to be that crazy and enjoy things more.
 
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