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Diary of a SimpForum Simp #3

JohnnyPunter

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Today I saw Stella for the 19th time. When I parked outside the agency, I got a text from the manager saying they had to move the booking back 30 minutes. It kinda sucked because I showed up 20 minutes early, so I had to sit in my car for 50 minutes. When I entered the agency, I almost got bowled over by some big, tall muscular guy coming down the stairs. He had a big smile on his face. Then I went and saw my Stella. She wasn't very responsive when I was going down on her, giving her oral, today for some reason. Then later when we were cuddling, I rested my head on her chest like always and I felt a slight sticky sensation on my cheek. There was also the hint of a strange smell. She must be using a new moisturiser cream or something. I never shower after my bookings with Stella as I like to keep her scent on me for as long as possible so my cheek has been sticky all day. And I keep smelling bleach in my house, Mum must have been disinfecting the surfaces again.

I jumped on another call with the Simp team this evening. Big S is still in the garage but he thinks his wife is starting to calm down. She is no longer putting on loads of washing when he is trying to sleep. However, he says he needs a new air mattress because even though it is inflated when he goes to sleep, when he wakes up in the morning it is totally deflated. So his body is all sore from sleeping on the garage floor half the night. He is in a right pickle because his wife has put him on a strict allowance of $20 a day from now on, until the money he took out of the mortgage account is paid back. And that $20 has to cover his bus fare AND his lunch, because his wife is no longer making his lunch in the mornings! I thought about just transferring him $19 to buy a new air mattress from the warehouse, but decided I can't spare it. I need to keep it to see Stella. NotMuchAdo was giving him instructions on how to find the leak and try and patch it up.

NotMuchAdo isn't faring much better. He went to the bank to get out a second mortgage to pay for a new engagement ring for his regular and the staff made him sit down with a Fraud Prevention Officer who hounded him with questions for a whole hour! They said they were concerned a romance scammer was scamming him. He had to explain to them that this was not the case this time. Yes, he did lose $20,000 after transferring it to a woman he was in an online relationship with, who promptly cut him off. He also lost $100,000 in the 2000s trying to help a Nigerian Prince transfer his fortune out of Nigeria. But he insisted this time was different, as he had actually met the woman. He says they finally agreed to let him go ahead with the mortgage application, but it is still being processed.

60sGuy again bought up the word game idea, and of course, none of us were interested. NotMuchAdo told him to go join the local lawn bowls club if he needed something to do.
 
No offense, but couldn't we just leave aside this "simp" talk from the other forum? It stopped being funny a while ago...

Now it just seems kind of silly to continue with the same silliness around here.
 
No offense, but couldn't we just leave aside this "simp" talk from the other forum? It stopped being funny a while ago...

Now it just seems kind of silly to continue with the same silliness around here.
Don't take this shit too seriously. This is the Popcorn Pit, which has been created specifically for this kind of silliness my friend. All you are really going to find in this section is shit posting and ridiculousness. We also plan to move arguments here if they get out of control and turn into flame wars, so they don't derail other threads. We haven't had anything like that yet, but I imagine we will as this place grows, and growing it is. The positive thing about it is that it allows us to keep the rest of the forum clean.

I know the stuff in this section is not going to be everyone's cup of tea, but some people will have a laugh reading the absolute nonsense that shows up in here. And I won't lie, I have a good laugh as well. :ROFLMAO:

If it does bother you, I would suggest ignoring the Popcorn Pit entirely. If enough other members find it annoying, we can always stop the posts here from showing up in the latest posts/what's new feed so it is less visible etc. 🍿

We can actually hide this part of the forum from just you individually, if you its too annoying. Just private message @PunterHub
 
The Simp team and their ideologies are a big part of what brought down the other forums, and why a better one is required. And Christ knows they loved to belittle any who didn't agree with their views. The least they could do in return is be the inspiration for a laugh or two.

If some people don't find it funny that's fine, there's no accounting for taste. But just move on.
 
I find these pretty funny and treat them for what they are, satire. I think that often people are trying to have these complex judgements online about people's sex lives, and while I accept that we have to balance power dynamics and consent, it is way to hard to have reasonable discussions about it in an internet forum.

There is a review at the moment on sexforum where a dude basically is looking for therapy through sex work. I literally thought it was JP on a troll account. Actually legit felt sorry for the guy.

Some dudes ain't built for this shit. We here to nut, not fall in love.
 
There is a review at the moment on sexforum where a dude basically is looking for therapy through sex work. I literally thought it was JP on a troll account. Actually legit felt sorry for the guy.

Some dudes ain't built for this shit. We here to nut, not fall in love.
Preach it mate, we just wanna fuck, pump cum dump nothing more nothing less.

He’ll figure it out the expenny & hard way that it’s not gonna work
 
Preach it mate, we just wanna fuck, pump cum dump nothing more nothing less.

He’ll figure it out the expenny & hard way that it’s not gonna work
Fuck me. There is another one on there about fantasizing about showing a mate how to punt and jerking off together to porn. Again, not completely unsure that it isn't JP on troll account.
 
Fuck me. There is another one on there about fantasizing about showing a mate how to punt and jerking off together to porn. Again, not completely unsure that it isn't JP on troll account.
Definitely not me. I am exclusively on here now and am not going to waste energy on SF. But the trolls over there must be getting bored since I left 🤣
 
Fuck me. There is another one on there about fantasizing about showing a mate how to punt and jerking off together to porn. Again, not completely unsure that it isn't JP on troll account.
lost causes over there🤣 feels like the trolling is even more now since they found out a handover is happening.

R.i.p SF, that shits gonna die when agent takes over imo, i think it’s gonna end up being monetised to the max and more brothel, sex worker friendly than punters
 
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